Inspired by Jozen Cumming’s blog post, I Could Have No Idea What I’m Talking About.
FOR THE WOMEN
Quit playing hard to get, start playing hard to keep.
Yesterday I tweeted the following sentences: “Girl, I’m not chasing you. I have asthma.” I don’t really have asthma (hopefully anyone who does isn’t offended), but what I was trying to say is I don’t have the time or the energy to chase after a girl and try to wear her down. Women who think playing hard to get will find themselves not gotten sooner than later.
Ladies, let a man have you, but do so on your own terms and watch how long he stays around. Now, he may bounce after the first sentence of back talk, but if he does, just let him go ladies. My point is, let a man work for the power he wants because honestly, it’s all we ever really want. Power….
I wanted you, but I don’t know exactly why. Maybe it was because you wanted me first. Or maybe because I knew I couldn’t (or shouldn’t) have you. You were with someone else and I respected your relationship. I respected her. Or maybe because the first time I saw you, you made me wonder who you were. That’s unusual because I’m rarely impressed. Or it could be that undeniable swagger of yours that made you stand out, even though your looks, to some, were second-rate. Maybe it was the stories I heard about you. You were off-limits– the bad boy, but to me you were always all good. Sweet, even.
You wanted me so you chased me. Just the way I like it. Our flirting sessions were magnetic. Always drawing us close, but never so close that we couldn’t pull back. It was all I could do since I couldn’t have you, after all. Eventually, when you parted with her, the chase elevated. Our interactions were no longer restricted to secret gazes and phone calls, brief exchanges of words. We were seen publicly, often in the same place we met: on the dance floor. You could turn and spin me, as if we belonged that way–arms intertwined, moving to the same beat, on one accord. There was something magical and unspoken between us that is still inexplicable.
On a humid spring night, you told me The Chase had to end. It was inevitable that we would be together–in some way–any way I would allow. Your words were very matter-of-fact–a turn-on and annoyance all at once. To give in to you would make me the loser in this neverending game, but I couldn’t say I wasn’t still feeling you. I was totally transparent.
Surprisingly, I, the orchestrator of The Chase stayed with you for a night. You were a perfect gentleman. I’m too old now to wonder if that was part of your “game”. Game or not, it was just what I needed then. For the first time in the many years of The Chase, we put the bullshit aside and actually talked. No distractions from the outside world or our own consciences. Just you and me.
A lot of questions that I had about you were answered that night. You told me your attraction to me was beyond physical. What you liked about me was that I exuded confidence and sexiness effortlessly. Those were the same things I liked about you. Conversation and laughs carried on into the late hours of the night. You weren’t the asshole I thought I knew anymore. You were your true self, and I’ll take that any day.
When I protested you holding me while we slept because I knew it would feel too good, you didn’t think much of it. You just laid there with me and fell asleep. Over in the night after darkness had blanketed the sky, I awoke to see that you’d wrapped your arms around me anyway. And that was fine with me.
The sun shined vibrantly through your bedroom window blinds alerting us to the morning. It was hard to believe that The Chase had possibly reached its apex. Your arms were still around me, and I didn’t want you to let go. I knew that from that moment on, things would never be the same. But they would have to be.
Years have passed and though not nearly as often as back then, The Chase is still there. And just the same, I wonder if I will ever let you catch me.